Hey, guys! According to women, dating you these days is like walking straight into a triple titanium shield of armor.
It’s as if you’re preparing for an intense battle. Yet, the battle has no opponent. So, what are you fighting off? Your feelings?
As women, we understand you have a heart to protect. But what happened to giving a girl a chance, or better yet — yourself?
Here are 7 ways you are shutting out the love of your life (and you don’t even know it):
1. You run for the hills.
Whether you’re a jogger or a sprinter, the minute things start to warm up between you and the girl you’ve been dating, you begin running.
The thought of getting too close scares the hell out of you, so you begin to plan your escape route to the nearest remote island.
You start to get cold as you wait for your departure date. You begin to slowly distance yourself as she tries to get in touch with you even more. You are hoping to let her off slowly, so she won’t even notice your disappearing act.
You intentionally book your flight for an extended vacay, hoping she will forget about you by the time you get back.
Owning up to your feelings is out of the question. And even considering her feelings is something you’re not about to do, as it’s too difficult to acknowledge what’s running through you.
As long you continue running, you are bound to end up on “single island” for a lifetime.
2. You’re always fishing for the best.
Dating is your happy place for you. You love reeling in a new catch of the day. The adventurous chase excites you beyond measures and you don’t think about much past the instant gratification. You always think there is going to be a new fish in the sea waiting to hang on your line.
Your search for “the one” is endless, as there are a plethora of options for you to choose from. In fact, there are so many how could you possibly choose just one.
However, while you’re busy being indecisive and throwing girls off your hook, you’ve probably let go of a few good ones.
But, it’s too late.
You discarded them like yesterday’s news. So what happens when the fish stop biting and you realize you let go of the wrong one?
3. You strive for perfection.
You have a mile-long checklist. She MUST have a professional job, be the most confident girl in any room, and look like the woman on the front cover of Vogue. She’s been living in your nightly dreams for as long as you can remember.
Your standards are so outlandish, she doesn’t even exist.
Every girl you date is missing a qualifying factor on your required resume. Her hair is too brown, her legs are too short, her degree isn’t from an Ivy League school, and the list goes on. And you create an excuse for every asset she has to prove to yourself she isn’t good enough for you.
How do you even know who she is when you don’t give her a chance?
And what if she is everything your heart desires to be fulfilled in love? When will you stop judging and look in the mirror to realize it’s you and not her that is sabotaging your happiness?
4. You retreat for hibernation.
You’re a self-righteous homebody who loves the comfort of your own company. You can choose what shows to watch, what toppings to order on your pizza all while sitting around in your sweats from your fraternity days. You don’t have to think twice about someone else’s desires or preferences.
Staying home is your M.O.
The thought of having to go out and socialize and make small talk is the last thing on your mind. Small talk is like death to you.
You prefer intellectual stimulation, yet you don’t give a girl a chance to even say hi for the fear you’ll be stuck in a dreadful convo for hours.
Every weekend you continuously retreat to your man cave as if the woman you deeply desire is going to come knocking on your door. Your lack of getting outside your comfort zone is starting to take a toll.
In fact, you can’t even remember the last time you even went on a date. How can you expect to find someone like that?
5. You try to remain emotionless.
Emotions scare the living hell out of you. It’s literally too much for you to handle. You’d rather jump out of a plane then bare the discomfort of being vulnerable with a woman.
Your emotions are dryer than the Sahara desert.
Keeping everything bottled up makes it almost impossible for a woman to open up to you.
She wants to know you have her best interest and feel safe with you. And when she feels you’re giving nothing to her, she is likely to keep her emotions on silent mode. The less you show, the less the connection will grow.
6. You’re totally inconsistent.
Predictability bores you to your core. You prefer living the free-spirit lifestyle and pursuing last-minute adventures. The unknowns excite you, and you’re always searching for the next thrill.
Making plans in advance brings out your rebellious side. As soon as you make them, you immediately dread the responsibility of sticking to your agenda.
While your quest for erratic excitement moves you, it has become wearisome to the women you date.
Never knowing when they will hear from you or see you begins to drive a wedge in the dynamic. It becomes so frustrating for her that she questions everything about who you are.
She begins to realize maybe there is someone out there who is better suited for her steady beating heart.
7. You rarely communicate.
Communication isn’t the name of your game. You’re as mysterious as they come, a man of few words. Keeping a low profile is what you’re all about.
While your mind is full of thoughts, rarely do you share them. It takes the right person to bring out your chatty side. But how will you ever keep the right woman if you don’t take the time to take interest in topics that excite her?
To keep a connection thriving, you’re gonna have to learn to make time to interact with her. This is the only way you can deepen your bond while getting to know a little more each day about what you share together.
If you don’t take the time to talk, then someone else will.
If these seven ways of repelling a potential love sound familiar, then you may want to rethink your approach next time you come across a woman you are interested in. Love is about taking risks.
And you can only reap the benefits if you’re willing to risk it all. So what you are waiting for?
Risk it all in the name of love. We dare ya!
Jan and Jillian Yuhas are Relationship and Lifestyle Coaches who help men attract the women they want. If you’re ready for a relationship, yet struggle with intimacy, contact them here for a complimentary call – Dating a Ten from Within.
Source via Yourtango.